on the way to buy tmr's breakfast from the ntuc across my house, i saw a little kid.

And he was prancing gleefully around his parents,
energetic even as the orange hues of the street lamps cast silhouettes over all that is below,
a physical cloak of lethargy emnating from its owners.

A young child,
where his only worries was how he was going to get his hands upon that red crayon
he had been eyeing on the colouring bench at school in the morning,
or how to get the canteen auntie to give him more
of that teeny little round biscuit with the little coloured sugary bits at the top.

He was prancing around his parents, around his father
in fact,

Attemping to catch the wafts of haze
like smoke that had magically appeared from
his father's mouth
after he had taken puffs from that paper stick he held to his hands.

His mother watched on,
holding his younger brother's hand, he standing silently,
staring in wonder at how his brother was trying to 'catch'
that fascinating haze in the air.

~

you know you have truly grown up, when your worries have surpassed simply worrying for your grades, worrying of the impression people have of you, or even worrying about matters of the heart -teenage whims in face of other issues.

~

I'm just really tired, that's all.

mc

truetrue. it's amazing like how he said.

with the number of stripes increasing on that little piece of cloth along their sleeves, literally, wearing the heart, the core of their behavior, on their sleeves, the level of arrogance increases exponentially.

well of course there are some nice ones.

but then that's only a minority.

i hope not though.

i sound like i'm muttering gibberish, but of course, due to the sensitivity of the content of the organisation i am in, as well as the renowned lines of communication within my unit, it would be unwise to divulge any further.

go figure.

~

oh and another update on my current finances (gosh this author is so transparent, even finances, dear me, finances he reveals. amazing...)

let's just say its time i started to dig out those pennies from under the table and in the pockets..

which amazingly amounted to about 26dollahs from yesterdays excavation.

hah.

in other news,

urgh.

yes i'm freaking irritated with the new fb info page which does away with all my groups..

and the whole thing is very very irking.

very.

argh.

5hours days for 7days straight cannot work. i swear i'm gonna sleep early tonight.

Band was amazingly tiring today, prolly had to do with the fact that i was already half asleep throughout the entire day..

Doesnt seem like it huh. haha that's me. Somehow on the exterior i would still be that crazy hyped up energy bunny when i'm near dropdead tired inside.

Imagine this madman with wild flyaway hair, and a half crazed glint on the eyes.

Yep, minus the hair of course, still currently pretty lacking in the hair department

Nevertheless, really liked what i'm doing, at least for this few days, dont know how it would be like when the parades start. I think i'm going to really like doing music, if i actually (i hope) end up in a place in a uni doing it.

oh.

and i'm currently crazy over Leona Lewis' song from Avatar, I See You, as well as a certain CF for this LG phone called Cooky.

:)

epic.

it's been awhile since i went for a swim alone

tired much. managed 20 laps in the hour plus i was there. was kind of a leisure swim and all, you know how those cartoons always show the 'thoughts' literally floating out of the person's mind and stuff, yea it was literally kinda like swimming in a pool of thoughts.

just thinking stuff through, mulling over stuff, and afterward basically just letting everything flow by.

and the feeling of lethargy blanketing my entire body after that, a blanket of comfort and indifference, shielding me from the rest of the world.

~

Tina Fey from Datenight said

"how i wish i can live just one day where my day doesnt go along how another people's moods are"

~

the swim was a good respite indeed.

(back and ready to take on the world hah)

~
met wr after that to help him with his testimonial, along with a quickie at macs (i'm in love with chicken mcnuggets currently)

~

my month's expenditures are beginning to catch up with me... was poring over my month's atm receipts after making the trip opposite to settle some accounts.

ohwell. i feel old.. sigh.

ah i think i'm beginning to sound depressed all the time on this blog, don't get me wrong, i'm still pretty much alive and hyper in the day and all, just never liked to vocalise my troubles much.

imagine if i told a friend about the wonders swimming along and muling in your thought does..

weird much. just much easier 'talking' to this browser infront of me, the almost white screen of the Compose page of blogger.

right anyhow, tmr's gonna be a good day, i feel it.

Individual Practice will be good. yep (if there's any, cant remember the schedule)

there, i'm done for the day, time for some of that 'me' time..

5

granddad's birthday celebration just now. will upload pictures soon.

and you know what i cannot forget?

how his face lit up when he saw his grandchildren, nearly all young adults now, lining up to give him red packets, doing what he used to do to us on our birthdays

and how his daughters and daughter in laws cooking dishes for the dinner at night.

~

went out for a movie after that, had a real heart to heart talk with my younger couz when he was walking me to the busstop at his house to catch a bus before that. hope he does decent enough for his olvls man..


oh and it's really been awhile since i really enjoyed myself hah.

~

saw my cousin at starbucks around midnight. and he didnt recognize me. sheesh.

~

right i think i'm really just rambling now.

gonna meet kow for lunch tmr, and help wr with his testimonial, and prolly swim after that.

okay no, make that Must swim after that. have been procrastinating that for 2weeks already.

till then,

glee? hahaha

haha i remember once she told me:

"at some point of your life, you have to just get used to being lonely."


~

kinda true.

don't know why, suddenly felt as if i'd be wasting my life away if i continued like this. hadnt really been practicing much despite it being a week now.

there's seriously much to do. got quite emo abit inside the practice room.. did me good or i wouldnt have any idea how long i would have taken to get myself fired up.

time to put what was given to me to good use.

~

granddad's birthday celebration tmr.

~

anyway,

aiya i don't know.

oh crap

i'm seriously getting severe lack of sleep. must start sleeping early.

slept at 130 last night and i think i'm gonna end up sleeping at 1 today.

and it's no joke if you wake up at 6-ish in the morning.

used to be able to do it for days straight in jc. must be getting on my years.

anyhow. working itunes is driving me mad..

aye but i'm thankful, at least i get to come home everyday.

may tmr at camp be a fruitful one.. unlike the first 3days.. -_-

feeling f_______ detached

don't know why.

went to the library in the last 10min before it closes in a desperate attempt to retain some intellectual knowledge in my fast debilitating brain due to you-know-what.

it's quite amazing how many cheap fantasy thrill plots are being spun out from the successes of the likes of Dianne Wynne Jones and Stephanie Meyer. Vampire love stories abound, most of which usually contain a cliche spinoff plot which kind of disgusts me.

I'm a real fan of fiction and fantasy stuff, give me vampires and wizards anyday, but yeah. this type of plots really put the dampener to whatever fervour i might have.

had a long talk with the parents on a certain career option i might take, missed out doing something really impt, at least, to me. hope i didnt cause any shit..

ah sheesh.

freaking worried.

appeton

ah.

nothing eventful much happened today i guess.

went out for supper with teng at night. okay more like it was more of me eating only.

had a long chitchat with him after that about practically everything under the sun.

everyone has their own problems hur.

love, life, family, career, future

shitload of stuff to be brooding over barely even hitting 20.

well guess that's just life. glad to say that i've at least have some kind of idea and plan charted out for some of this aspects. i think.

really liked how even though we havent really talked much since parting ways in sec sch, maybe the occasional meet up and all, yet we still remained close as friends.

True friends really don't necessary need to be those who hang around your side 24/7 and talk to you every sec of the day.

you just know they're there when you need them.

ah well.

it's been a nice night.


PS: really envy him having such an awesome younger sister. when she called him to realise he was at the void deck talking, she wanted to bring supper his mum had bought down for him to eat. freaking sweet right.

quite shocking. alot of people going into units.

like half?

so much for (enhanced leadership...)

i know this is kinda weird but the tension is killing me.

waking up at sporadic intervals from the timespan of 8am till 930 is no joke.

*bursts awake, posting is out!!!!

2min later.

*bursts awake, posting is out!!!

3min later

*bursts awak, posting is out!!!

yeah you get the idea.

listening to some trance now to filter all that tension out. hah.

6min more

trekked 7km today.

and i wasnt even in tekong.

yes. hsbc treetop walk. if my fb hasnt already gave a pretty complete picture, went to macritchie reservoir and trekked to the treetop walk (which is beautiful by the way) before heading to jalan kayu for dinner.

oh. and it rained cats and dogs during the trekked.

yes. somewhere in the middle of all that jungle trail we camped out in a small wooden shelter, socks (for the case of me and gary) soggy and wet. oh but he brought a chance of footwear while i did not, so you can prolly figure how it felt reaching home and taking of the pair of canvas contraption attached to my leg somehow specially designed to hold onto copious amounts of water and at the same time giving it a pungent odour.

but oh, been there done that in army.

just one lil' problem. it aint the army....

so yeah anyway, cancelled plans with hw for dinner and pubbing for the night due to the lil' misadventure back at the reservoir.

had madjacks for dinner at jalankayu followed by some prata. honestly, i think madjack there's pretty good. nice ambience since it aint one of those popular madjack outlets (paradiz) and yea food's decent.

but my stomach seem to have got out of the wrong side of its bed this morning, i think that's the fifth time i went to toilet since i got home, 2 within the span of this blog post.. awesome right.. -_-

must be the mc spicy i had for lunch.

didnt manage to swim today due to circumstances (friend arriving at my house 2hours later than the expected 10am and the establishment of the treetop hijinks in the afternoon)

shall do so tmr afternoon.

nice nice sun. please stay there.

no rain please, thanks.

oh.
vocation posting coming out tmr. freaking feels like junior college posting i felt 2years ago.

freak.

almost lapsed into a moment of impulse buying at the online apple store.

ipod nano :)

decided itouch eats too much batt life and is wayyyy too ex.

suddenly caught myself.

apparently i made up my mind in 15min and i'm just about to enter the credit number in and stuff.

hmm.

gonna give it 24hours to stew in my head.

after which.

green yellow or silver?

wanted black but pity it's out...



but damn you gotta admit, itouch is beautiful.... arghhh

the thing with laundry is how the sun always seems to be bright and shiny before you put the laundry out.

and once you take the laundry out of the washing machine, tediously put on the hangers and clips and heave them out into the sun, the sky suddenly seems grey and ominous. sheesh.

-

now as to why i'm doing laundry, that's cause i'm home. and not outside.

okay don't take me to be some kinda pampered kid now. honestly hadnt been doing much laundry since. uh. don't know when cause junior college life simply saps the energy away from you from morning at 530am till you reach home at 7pm at night. and then there's homework.

and army. yeah, it's army.

but hey, i've still been good and helping out with dishes and ironing clothes whenever i can okay..

:)

right anyway that brings me back to why i'm at home.

it's kinda sad. 1 week of precious block leave and i'm at home for most part of the day. well if it's family time it's cool, but yeah, bro's at work and mum and dad's attending to some stuff of my late uncle.

thur, fri, sat, sun.

and back to army.

gosh it's a countdown again.

argh..

and i'm bored at home.

but then again, being at home means a nil on spending, which is really awesome for my bank account which hasnt quite recovered from bintan.

but then again, the lack of hanging out with sentient beings other than the ones living with me a.k.a going out with friends, is suffocating. i'm sure yall can pay testament to that.

but then again, being alone is kinda relaxing sometimes.

but then again, not all the time.

ah okay you get my drift eh.

the dilemmas of a young man. sigh.

went back to cchms this afternoon to meet miss ho a.k.a Jomel (scary teacher this one is, landed 7boys in inhouse detention for skipping her class hah) with kc. being bald and all's real interesting. students and juniors walking right past me eating that awesome meepok the auntie made and not recognising me. even the band teachers in charge didnt recognise me... so it went something like this.


(was sitting at the seats outside the grand auditorium when the 2 band teachers walked past Mrs T and Ms L)

me: Ms L!

(gets ignored, i think she didnt hear me..)

me: Mrs T!

(Mrs T turns and stares)

Mrs T: oh who is this. (walks closer)

me: don't recognise me already ah...

Mrs T: (very close proximity already) OMG wengsiong!!!!!!

/Ednote: at this point, she literally shrieked. and then she started laughing like mad. really, never seen a baldie ? -_-

Mrs T: Ms L ! Ms L ! Look who's here!!!! (more laughter) ....

Ms L: (turns. looks. pauses. guffaws away..)

yea you get the idea...

ah well. must have looked pretty darn different.

headed to downtown to catch datenight. pretty awesome movie.

funny. good plot. best of all, kinda meaningful.

definitely worthwhile movie to watch.

headed to simei to meet up with classmates for dinner after that. well, some of them.

~

block leave days are counting down.... must meet up with that certain few people before it's back to army again.
ah well.

yeah i guess there's pretty much nothing else to talk bout other than tmr being the day where my vocation's posting is out...

gee.


sll the best

andd i'm back from bintan.

other that it being a bomb (literaly $$ bomb) and ultimately awesome, i'm simply too shagged to mentally perform well enough to type out a couple of random musings bout the trip.

yep. maybe tmr.

waking up in 5hours for confinement. i'm actually quite 'excited' bout it.

as in. it's a first, and you know how i am with first experiences hahah

gathered with the alumni from sec sch band today. really awesome grp of people. different people of different ages yet we can easily spend time together just laughing like mad away and talking about our own lifes and stuff

fantastic.



and we all agreed to watch a concert together, have a picnic, go jamming, sing ktv, and go night cycling within this yr.. hahahah :)

~

i think block leave is gonna be damn awesome. meetups with friends and catching up with old ones.

~

ok thought of stuff to write, but suddenly had some kinda mental block which lasted like half hr..

and yes 4hours to wake up -_-

i'd better sleep.

signing out,

bald head

i'm still mega worried for my vocation.

meeting zy for sticks later at city, then alecia and zj for dinner at raffles, followed by gathering with the cchs percs at clarkequay. (i think i'm gonna feel the pinch in cash soon though..)

awesome.

if only there wasnt confinement tmr morning at 620am -_-

i think my neighbourhood's kinda ...

everytime i come out of macs from supper at rivervale plaza, i always seem to see 1 or 2 policemen there talking to a group of teenagers hanging out there.


oh well.

prolly past their curfew or something..

alright

i'm quite amazed i'm still awake after waking up this morning. like. at 3am.

and after a 24km route march.

lol

right

goodnight yall

Private

and there we go.

Passing out Parade is over.

BMTC ends.

a new NS life awaits.

to those april peeps entering. have fun :D
hahaha

and my my.

reserve guard duty tmr and confinement on saturday.

whoopie.

somehow i dont really feel much towards these.

oh well. maybe that's cause it's over.

anyhow, here's recruit to private, signing out.

PS: prolly heading out to find pohyih for supper or smthg..

No signboard

a few more hours to bookin.

brought him to eat breakfast at some dimsum restaurant. bro treated. seeing the smile on his face, the idea that his own grandchildren have grown up to posses the capability to treat their grandfather to a decent meal, really makes us very happy.

i'm setting my sights on the no signboard outlest at esplanade after i get my month's pay. i think he'll like the night scenery along the river there.

burn a hole it will, but oh well, how often do you get to do this.

weirdly thought of her lastmoments on the way back home this afternoon. to think nearly 1/3 of a year has passed. still miss her alot.

~

ah back from that sad note.

3hours to book in. and 4more days to pop :)

i foresee kind of a rough week. i don't know why.

cause i think i pissed off a sergeant real bad. gd luck to me..

but then again, it's only 4days.. (as long as i don't get guard duty or confinement or stuff)

gonna need to go and draw money for the platoon trip to bintan :) awesome stuff.

i kinda realise the preceding lines are actually forming a pattern

okay i think it's just coincidence, it just happens

ahahah now it's going downwards

damn cool lol

~

okay enough with random rambling

pop here i come :)

____

today has been.. i don't know.

left in the morning to pick up my grandad from the hospital. he discharged today.

learnt abt how the old patient next to his bed passed away yesterday at around 6pm. half hour after i left the place.

~

sometime in the afternoon i had concluded how screwed up everything was, in light of things that had happened

~

and i saw my grandad digging out money to put into red packets as he passed them to my first and 2nd uncle: for my male cousins going into NS.

one of them is only sec4 this year. still 2 more years to go.

he then brought out his life savings to be used as expenses.
i then thought of the late patient i mentioned earlier.

Life is transient aint it.

and sometimes you just want to sit down and ponder over what you have achieved in life, rather than what you're gonna achieve. count your blessings and cherish them.

friends you have made, true friends, not those that come and go. and of the special few ones, of those you know you can trust and love, of my family, where unconditional love is embodified.

tonight, a group of 11 of us sat down to a family dinner, squeezing into a small round table, elbows touching the ones beside. 11 bowls of rice, a few dishes and a big bowl of soup.

nothing comes close.

~

i really do

pre-emptive

Really, if there's something i would love to harp upon about army, it's about the absolutely mind boggling efficiency of the organisation. -_-

but yea, you'd get bored.

anyhow, kinda pissed off since there's a possibility that i might be down for guard duty tmr, that means booking in tmr and spoiling an otherwise terrific weekend.

and i'm freaking tired.

i think there's some kind of connection between the duration of bmt and the level of energy one has. even though it's just a mere 4day week this week, feels like a lifetime away from home and hell am i completely sapped of energy or what.

seriously, i somehow feel more tired than during the 2wk confinement period. whoopie.

oh well. maybe it's an early night.

maybe